On D List of Movie Reviews
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Dr. No (1962)
Rate:
5
Viewed:
1/11
1/11:
Although not the first Bond film in history (the distinction goes to Casino Royale with Barry Nelson in 1954),
Dr. No officially started off the James Bond franchise as it is for the past five decades.
Now, I've seen plenty of these movies, but I must say James Bond is the most overrated character of all time. He's
not an interesting fellow but rather a sleazebag and manwhore who won't take no for an answer and is always given the easy
way out, no matter how dire the situation is.
On average, James Bond beds between three and five women a film, and he changes them frequently like underwear. Every
time he picks up a woman, he forces her to meet him at an appointed time or "else." Oh yes...each of them has to
qualify as "beautiful" to warrant attention. Otherwise, James Bond will keep on "spying." A case in point, Ursula Andress was
probably the number one model in the world in 1962 (today, to my surprise, she's ugly as sin), and James Bond naturally has
to be paired with her.
These films often has gaps in logic. So, explain this to me: how the heck is Honey
Ryder (sexism is a constant theme) on Crab Key without being accosted or apprehended by hordes of agog men? She
being a marine biology wiz isn't believable which is akin to Denise Richards passing herself off as a nuclear physicist
(with a Ph.D., for goodness' sake) in The World Is Not Enough.
I've mentioned before how easy it is for James Bond to survive the impossible situations. It's still the biggest running joke
of the franchise which is the reason why spy spoofs exist. Notice in Dr. No, James is caught by guys in the Dragon tank.
So, why keep him alive? Okay, okay...Dr. No wants him on his team. But James refused the offer. So, why bother
keeping him alive afterwards? Just kill him already.
Nooooo, James Bond has to be beaten up first before being thrown into the room with a *gasp* vent while sporting no facial
bruises because dammit...he must look good for the audience. Then, he manages to unloose screws, with nary a tool mind you,
before escaping through the vent. How the heck does he know where to go once inside the maze? He must be a fucking robot
with a GPS inside his head.
While there, he succeeds by going to the nerve center which has no security guards. How stupidly easy
it is for him to do it. James Bond must be the greatest spy of all time. His anticlimactic fight with Dr. No ensues
with a predictable end result. Anyway, enough of the negatives. Now, on to the positives:
The movie, especially the sets, is creatively done, and I love how the people dress and look. Sean Connery will always be James
Bond although I wonder how Cary Grant would make out. It has the most famous scene of the entire franchise when
Sean Connery introduced himself as "Bond...James Bond." Hey, he gets to meet Jack Lord of Hawaii Five-O fame. How cool
is that? The classic opening title sequence, as it's been the case for almost every Bond picture going forward, is
unforgettable.
All in all, Dr. No is a good start for the most overrated movie franchise ever.