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Legends of the Fall (1994)

Rate: 7
Viewed: 8/03, 1/05, 2/07, 4/13

LegendsF
2/07: Having reminded me of Written on the Wind, Legends of the Fall is a ridiculous soapfest about silly problems that are easily avoidable in the first place.

Everybody is lucky to have Brad Pitt in the film because he's the only aspect worth watching. Pretty much, the story is about a family getting away with murders, and suicide runs deep, too. Tristan, Alfred, and their father are in the business of killing people. Samuel and Susannah commit suicide. So, why not call the film Killers of the Fall?

All in all, Legends of the Fall is pretty much about Brad Pitt's golden hair.

4/13: Woe is me as Susannah Fincannon reaches for her nickel-plated .38 snubnosed revolver and shoots herself in the head.

Did she do it for one of the following reasons:

1. Tristan wasn't interested in her?
2. She thought she was special?
3. She decided to stay in Montana for nothing?
4. Isabel was prettier than her?
5. She belonged to the elite social class which was vapid to begin with?
6. She slept with three men who happened to be brothers?
7. She was once married to Samuel?
8. And also to Alfred?
9. She was irrelevant?
10. She couldn't have Tristan?
11. She was just a lay to Tristan?
12. Tristan wasn't interested in her?
13. Isabel had children with Tristan?
14. Tristan wasn't interested in her?
15. She couldn't have Tristan?
16. Or all of the above?

That's why Susannah takes the cake as the most pathetic character. By the way, I didn't see the Borzoi again after he got off the train, so what happened to the dog?

Running in a close second to Susannah is Samuel. Should he have been labeled a "village idiot"? The third place goes to Alfred. Poor him, the color of his eyes wasn't enough to sway over anyone. Coming in fourth is One-Stab. The funniest cornball scene is when he pretended to scalp the heads of dead men. I was like, "Um, Ritalin, anyone?" Next up is Anthony Hopkins for his usual overacting and phony magnanimousness.

Finally, the last but not the least: Brad Pitt. It seems either of the following will happen: people die around him or he takes a long vacation break and comes back looking prettier than ever.

All in all, Legends of the Fall is all about Brad Pitt's golden hair.