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Steel Magnolias (1989)

Rate: 1
Viewed: 9/12

StMag
9/12: If you need proof to back your statement that "Chick Flicks Suck," look no further than Stool Boognolias.

Clearly, it's among the worst ever. Instead of one, there are six prima donnas: Julia Roberts, Olympia Dukakis, Sally Field, Dolly Parton, Daryl Hannah, and Shirley MacLaine. Each has a string behind her back, and a single pull will have her screaming, "Look at me! Look at me! I am the Queen of the South!" This awful disease-movie-of-the-week is a rip-off of Terms of Endearment with the same story and the same predictable ending.

Daryl Hannah looks ridiculous. Dolly Parton is famous for one and only one thing, and it's not even her singing voice. Sally Field has done better in other pictures. Olympia Dukakis is like, "Look at me! I am Ol-l-l-y-y-y-m-m-p-i-i-i-a Duk-ak-i-i-i-i-s!" Shirley MacLaine is the biggest whore in California by having slept her way to the top.

The worst of the worst (well, Shirley MacLaine is really the worst) is Julia Roberts who "can make puffy faces and cry on cue!" that's replete with "this is ABOUT ME! DAMN IT!" atttitude. Gosh, I just want to punch her in the face. Horrible, horrible, horrible. The misguided feminist message the movie tried to convey is called "brainwashing."

All in all, I hate Stool Boognolias with intense passion.